What can I sell you?

I have two goals for 2016, to sell things and to show people I’m a marketing genius. So my audience, I ask you what would you buy from me. It can honestly be anything, don’t limit it to just apparel. I want to create a brand/unique products and use my marketing genius to make you buy lots of them. I’m open to anything, I’ll buy whatever equipment is necessary. In my life the only thing that will make me happy is growing a business. Since I don’t have that opportunity right now I’ll just create a business and then grow it.

Designing Experiences

This past week I became obsessed with buying a Surface Pro 4, I’m mean obsessed. I looked at all the reviews, spent hours on reddit and finally went to Best Buy to pull the trigger. I heard all the things about bad build quality and such but I didn’t care, I wanted one.

When I got to Best Buy they had two demo units set up. The first one wouldn’t turn on. I messed with it for a bit and finally it did turn on. Once it booted up I noticed it had a busted screen. I knew that was a possibility so I moved on to the next one. This one also had a busted screen. So in the store they had no working Surface Pro 4s. There was no way I was going to buy one now. Even in my obsessed state buying something where every single demo model was busted seemed insane.

I’ve been to Best Buy several times since then and they still haven’t replaced the demo units with working ones. That amazes me. Doesn’t that store have managers. Not only is it a bad reflection of Microsoft but it makes Best Buy look like a bunch of idiots. If I ran a store I would make sure that everyone’s first impression was a good one. Making sure that all the demo products work seems like the least they could do, to me that just makes sense.

For me it’s the same thing for web companies. If your potential user’s first impression is bad I don’t think they are ever coming back. This is especially true for your marketing sites/emails/swag because that is most people’s first impression of your product. Just keep that in mind.

My First WooCommerce Extension

Ecommerce fascinates me. For me the best way to master something is immersion. Look back at this blog you’ll see how obsessed I can get 🙂 . When it came to WooCommerce just setting up a store wasn’t enough, I wanted to make extensions and themes and get into the mindset of a WooCommerce user.

I was recently messing around with a WordPress store concept and the theme I used had a really neat feature to add sizing charts. I like the concept but the implementation wasn’t that great. It gave people too many options and wasn’t all that intuitive. I knew I could do it better. I’ll admit I was a bit nervous. I use to write code on a daily basis but that was years ago. But I decided to just dive in head first and see what happened. A big thanks goes out to Hugh. I put out the call for help on twitter and the code he gave me was perfect.

So this concept isn’t unique, the code isn’t revolutionary. There are a few extensions that do similar things. However, where I think my extension shines is in it’s approach. Basically there is a metabox added to all products. There you can upload a sizing chart image or select one from your image library. If there is an image set on your product than a link is added on the frontend. When users click on that link a sizing chart is opened up in a lightbox. That’s it. You just set the image and it’s done.

At my company, PoolParty, I want to focus on microextensions. Extensions the only do one thing and do it in the simplest way possible. I’m basically building the extensions that I would want. I’m going to be putting them for sale for $5 each (I’m a businessman after all) and we’ll see what happens. Maybe no one will buy them but I don’t really care. I’m building extensions for me and if other people want them that’s great. My second extension came out of building the site to sell my first extension and I imagine all my other ones will have similar origin stories.

Above is a short video of it in action. I know I shouldn’t have included copyrighted music but if Drake wants to sue me that’s great as I’ve been looking for an opportunity to dust off my law degree anyway.

Edit: I guess I’m not allowed to do this so I’m giving the company to my brother.

WordPress Swag Store

So I don’t know if you know this about me but I have trouble obsessing about things. After the launch of the Slack store and the revelation that MailChimp sold over 100k worth of playing cards it’s been a bad day for me. I was super happy to see the swag store move to WordPress but I wasn’t really happy with how it looks.

My vacation started today so I decided to mock up what I would like the store to look like. You can find it over at here (removed the live demo and adding a few screenshots below). Keep in mind it’s pretty rough I just took a $59 theme and a couple hours of tweaking. What I’m basically looking for is something bold and in your face and that is what I tried to do here. Think of what could happen if a real designer worked on it instead of me.

FS: mecha wapuu pins

I spent a stupid amount of money on these wapuu pins and I would like to get a little bit of it back to finance a Surface Pro 4. I’m trying to sell 30 mecha wapuu pins for $99. I’m selling them at my cost ($3.30 per pin) plus free shipping. Any takers?


Drake Inspired WordPress t-shirt

I’ll admit I’m fiercely competitive when it comes to swag. When I see something cool all I can think about is making something even cooler. The VIP team here at work made this really neat shirt that says RUN VIP in the style of a classic RUN DMC shirt. Everyone loves it, especially Matt. So I’ve been thinking ever since how I could make a shirt so cool that Matt would want to wear it too.

At WordCamp US I had the pleasure of meeting someone (Rose Kuo) who introduced herself as wapuu’s biggest fan. We started talking about swag and she gave me the secret formula to creating Matt approved swag. It’s pun/parody + rap lyrics = the perfect shirt. While at the WCUS after party it came to me, hotline bling. Not only is it a fun and catchy song but the lyrics are simple enough that doing parody lyrics would be quite simple.

You used to comment on my
You used to, you used to

You used to comment on my WordPress
Late night when you need my code
Comment on my WordPress
Late night when you need my code
And I know when that slack bot ping
That can only mean one thing
I know when that slack bot ping
That can only mean one thing

I hired some guys on fiverr to rap the parody version but they were both so terrible (even by fiverr standards) that left it out.

Mascot for my ecommerce dev shop

I’ve been really excited about ecommerce lately. During Christmas break I wanted to push myself and try something new so I’m starting a little shop that’s going to release WooCommerce themes (among other things). Since swag is super important to me my first task was to get a logo/mascot designed.

Below is what we came up with. Not sure what his name is yet but he’s so cute, I love him.